“She’s hurting so much, Lou,” I sigh, running a hand through my wavy, light brown hair. “Did you see her latest interview? That smile of hers was anything but real.”
“I know, El,” Louis says, rubbing my upper right arm. “I just wish we could do something for her. I have no idea what was going through Harry’s head when he did what he did.”
I nod. “And that Kate? She’s horrid,” I groan. “What does Harry see in her?”
“I don’t know; but whatever it is, it’s probably buried deep, deep inside of her,” he says. “How many days has it been since they’ve broken up? Three? Four?”
“A week and a half, Lou,” I tell him, rolling my eyes slightly.
Just then, the door opens and in come the rest of the boys, minus Harry, along with Danielle and Soha. Just two days ago, Soha had moved in with Niall. She’s attending Uni now with me, and Niall had offered for her to stay with him. “Hey, guys,” Zayn sighs, sitting down next to me as the other sit on the couch across from us.
“What’s up?” Niall asks as he too sits down in between Liam and Soha.
“Just talking about Harry,” Louis sighs.
As if on cue, the door swings open and in come Harry and Kate, holding hands while laughing. “Hey everyone,” Harry grins as they walk in. He’s grinning; smiling, as if he didn’t just go through a rough break up with the girl he loves.
“Hi,” we all mumble in response.
“What’s everyone up to?” he asks, putting an arm around Kate as she smiles up at him. Urgh.
“Just talking about how we all miss Carly,” Zayn snaps. There we go. Zayn was the one who was most angry about the whole Carly-Harry break up. Carly is like a younger sister to Zayn, with him already having two younger sisters, so he knows how much Carly’s hurt.
Harry’s eyes hardened and Kate’s face dropped. Yeah, that’s right. “Can you not talk about her when I’m around?” Harry says in a sharp tone.
“Why not?” Zayn glares at him. “Because it just reminds you of how much you hurt her?”
“Zayn,” I whisper, since I was closest to him.
“No, Eleanor!” he exclaims, standing up. He then turns, facing Harry. “Carly’s like a little sister to me, Harry. You know how much she loved you, and you decide to cheat on her with... Her?” he says the last part in a disgusted tone, looking at Kate. She glares at him. I swear, if looks could kill, Kate would be dead over thirty times by now because of the glares the rest of us were sending her.
“Nothing is wrong with Kate, Zayn,” Harry snaps, pushing Kate behind him in a defensive manner. “She’s an amazing girl who I truly like, so if you don’t mind, get your nose out of my business.”
Louis suddenly stands up. “Are you even hearing yourself, mate?” he asks Harry, wide eyed. “You’re acting as if Carly doesn’t mean anything to you.”
Harry looks at Louis, his green eyes softening at the mention of Carly’s name but hardening a split second later. “She doesn’t mean anything to me, Lou,” Harry says. “At least, not anymore.”
My jaw drops and eyes widen as I look at Danielle and Soha, who are both in shock as well. When I look back at Harry, I see him already dragging Kate out of the flat, closing the door behind them. Louis and Zayn plop back down on the couch on either side of me, and I use either hand to rub both of their backs. “I can’t believe him,” Liam mutters, shaking his head.
I let out a sigh. “You’re not the only one, Li.”
The bracelet laid still on my wrist as I played around with it, contemplating on whether or not if I should take it off. It was Harry’s last gift to me, so I don’t know if I should keep it on or not. Letting go of the bracelet’s black band, I decide on letting it stay on my wrist. Don’t ask why, because I honestly don’t know. I don’t have the heart to take it off, because then my wrist would feel bare.
I can’t explain it.
“The anchor shows that you’re my rock, my anchor. Without you, I don’t know what would happen to me. Without you, there’s no me.” Harry’s words echoed in my mind, making my heart ache even more.
Was that a lie to him? Or did he mean it, at the time? I don’t know what to believe, seeing as he has moved on so quickly. Ever since I had announced I was single, Harry didn’t hesitate in walking out of his flat with Kate, holding hands and laughing.
The hurtful part is that his smile seems genuine. It’s like he totally forgot about the fact that he dated me for a year. All that matters to him now is Kate. The girls have called me a bunch of times, and haven’t hesitated to tell me how horrible and rude Kate is. But I try to steer clear of the conversations about Kate and Harry, because I’d much rather talk about other things. The last thing I need is talking about my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
“Carly, I’m done seeing you mope around,” Ashley suddenly says.
I look up at her. She’s dressed as if she’s going somewhere, and then there’s me; wearing my sweatpants and a baggy T-shirt with my hair in a messy bun. “Too bad, Ash,” I reply.
Ashley sighs, sitting down next to me. “You’re my best friend, Carly,” she says, “and I’m saying this because I love you; you need to move on.”
I groan. “Ashley, it’s only been like, two weeks since the break up. I’m gonna need time,” I tell her. “I can’t just move on as fast as Harry.” I wince as I mention his name, internally cursing myself.
“Stop thinking about him,” Ashley sighs. “He’s a jerk, alright? He’s no good for you. You need to move on,” she repeats.
I think about it for a moment. Moving on actually sounds like a good idea. I can’t just sit around and cry in my flat. No, I can’t do that. I have to be productive and go out, and enjoy some time with my friends. I can’t give Harry the satisfaction of him running around with his new girlfriend, and me just sitting in my home. I should go out and have fun; throw it in his face that I’m better off without him. That I don’t need him.
“You’re right, Ash,” I say after a while, standing up. “Let me just get ready.”
“Actually,” Ashley stopped me, standing up as well. “I was gonna change into my pajamas, and you should too.”
I look at her, confused. “It’s the middle of the day. And I thought we were going somewhere?”
Ashley shook her head. “Come here,” she says, taking my hand. She drags me to the front door and when she opens it, my jaw drops.
Standing outside are LuLu, Clare, and my other friend Laura. I let out a squeal of delight and crush them all in a hug, causing them to laugh. “What are you all doing here?” I ask once I let go of them.
“We heard about your break up,” LuLu bites her lip. “And we’re here to cheer you up.”
“So you flew from London to LA?” I laugh, letting them inside.
“Anything for you, babe,” Clare smiles.
I let the girls in and Laura says, “We’re having a pajama party, okay? Everyone, change!”
LuLu and Clare come with me to my room while Laura goes with Ashley in hers, and I change. I put on my pajama pants and a loose full sleeved top, but I roll the sleeves to my elbows and tie the shirt on my back with a scrunchie. Once we’re all changed, we walk into the living room.
“So what’re we doing?” I ask.
“Well, instead of mourning over He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named by eating ice cream,” LuLu begins, “we’re gonna bake cupcakes!”
I grin, loving the sound of that. We all go into the kitchen and Ashley takes out some ingredients for cupcakes. We all bake chocolate cupcakes, and then put some chocolate frosting on top. That’s what happens when all of us are chocoholics. Once the cupcakes are baked, we sit on the counter and shove them in our mouths, enjoying the deliciousness. Once we had finished eating, we all took several pictures, making random poses. My favorite picture was with my back facing the camera and my left hand on my hip as my upper half is faced towards the camera while my right arm is up in the air as I make a kissy face. The rest of the girls are doing silly poses as well and then I post it on Twitter.
@CarlyMcKinley: Nothing like spending time with your best friends. I love you guys. xx @AshleyC @LuLuLu @Clare_M @ItsLaura http://i1248.photobucket.com/albums/hh496/biebersgirl222/Pictures/Carlyafterbreakup_zps33551974.jpg
Once the tweet was posted, I threw my phone away, and enjoyed some quality time with my friends.
I stared at the picture she had just posted. She seemed like she was having a great time with her friends. I scrolled through my Twitter time line, and saw how fans were commenting about Carly’s picture, saying that she should just have fun and forget everything. Even my fans were saying that. And since I followed Carly’s friends on Twitter, I didn’t miss reading their tweets about me.
@LuLuLu: @CarlyMcKinley babe I love you. we’re gonna have some fun tonightttttt :Dx
@AshleyC: Some men can be so heartless at times; it sucks seeing your loved ones like this.
@Clare_M: Just made the best cupcakes in the world with @CarlyMcKinley @AshleyC @ItsLaura and @LuLuLu. #party
@ItsLaura: We gonna party like it’s 3012 tonightttt.
My jaw clenched as I exited out of Twitter, and in one swift movement, I threw my phone across the room as it hit the wall with a hard impact, breaking into pieces. My hands reached up to my head, tugging at my curls. I run a hand over my face, closing my eyes tightly. Why do I keep looking at her Twitter? It just hurts. And that interview of hers...
When I saw her say that she was single, and make up the stupid excuse of us just wanting to see different people, it broke my heart. Obviously, I didn’t want us to break up – that’s the last thing I wanted. I loved Carly, I really did, and seeing her just not be mine anymore hurts so fucking much.
I never meant for kissing Kate. She just showed up out of nowhere. One night I got drunk, and she took advantage of that. We kissed and then it led into something a lot more. And when Carly called me about the whole thing, I froze. I didn’t know what to say or do, so I didn’t bother hiding it. And I regret yelling at her, and saying all of those things to her. That was the most awful thing I’ve ever done.
“What the fuck was that?” Louis asks, bursting into the room.
“Nothing,” I mutter, sitting down on the edge of my bed.
Louis walks further into my room. “That was not nothing,” he says. “I heard something crash.” He looks around the room until his eyes land on the smashed phone on the ground. “Why’d you do that?”
“I got mad,” I mumble, running a hand through my unruly hair.
Louis rubs the back of his neck as he lets out a sigh and sits down next to me. “I’m guessing you saw Carly and her friends’ tweets?”
I nod slightly. “Yeah.”
“Can you blame them, Haz?” Louis sighs. “You hurt their best friend.”
I roll my eyes. “Doesn’t mean she and her friends have to be immature about the whole thing, posted tweets about it.”
Louis looks at me. “You can’t blame Carly,” he says. “All she did was tweet a picture about having a good time, and her friends just did what they thought was right.” He stood up. “Honestly, Harry, you’re no better.”
I look up at him, frowning. “What are you talking about?”
“You’re showing off Kate,” he says. “It’s like you don’t even care about Carly anymore, or about her feelings. All you care about is forgetting her. How can you do that?”
I stood up, facing Louis. I was a bit taller than him, so he had to look up slightly to look me in the eye. “It’s my way of moving on, Louis,” I tell him through gritted teeth. “I like Kate, okay? She’s helping me forget and get over Carly.”
“You’re willing to just forget about her? Just like that?” Louis asks incredulously, his eyes widening.
I take a deep breath through my nose. “Yeah.”
“You’re unbelievable,” Louis says, his tone changing into a harsh one. “Need I remi
nd you that you loved Carly. What ever happened to the Harry that used to be head over heels for her?”
I clench my jaw as I answer him. “He came to his senses.”