That’s how long it took for Harry to lose me.
I don’t know what happened. Everything was going perfectly. Everyone was happy and nothing was going wrong, until she showed up.
I sat on my bed, writing down lyrics for my fourth song for the second album as I played some tunes on the guitar Mum and Brian had gotten me for Christmas. The second album was making a lot of progress, and I had writted down three songs without a problem. I had come back to LA right after Christmas, and unfortunately, I couldn’t stay for Louis’ twenty first birthday party that Harry had thrown for him. Coco was here with me, and Ashley had quickly grown a liking to him, and vice versa.
As I wrote the chorus down for my song, Ashley came bursting through the doors. “Carly, I have to show you something,” she says urgently.
I put the guitar and my pencil down. “What’s wrong?”
“Look, I’m only showing you this because you’re my best friend and I love you, okay?” she says, hesitantly handing me a magazine.
Worriedly, I look at the page and immediately, my heart drops. Just by reading the title, my heart breaks into a billion pieces. ‘Carly and Harry – Over For Good?
‘This is the most heart breaking article we’ve ever had to write – no lie. Looks like the most adorable couple is headed for Splitsville. New pictures from Louis Tomlinson’s 20th birthday bash have surfaced – and they may not be pleasant for some of you. Pictures of 18 year old Harry Styles dancing with girls have come up, but none of them are his gorgeous singer girlfriend, Carly McKinley.
Carly had to leave London to go back to Los Angeles for her own career, leaving her boyfriend behind. Though, that didn’t seem like a problem for Harry. He had been seen dirty dancing with multiple girls at his best mate’s birthday party, having the time of his life.
Though, at the time, we had only thought they were only pictures and that the 18 year old was just enjoying himself. But our thoughts proved incorrect when new pictures of Harry came out, walking around with a mysterious blonde girl. At first we thought the girl was nothing but a friend to Harry, maybe even a family member. But that all changed when a picture of Harry kissing this mysterious blonde was leaked.
So is Harry cheating on Carly? Or was it some sort of mistake? And what does Carly have to say about this? Does she not know, or is her heart breaking because of the curly haired boy?”
I dropped the magazine on the bed, the tears gathering in my eyes. I felt as if something heavy was being pressed up against my stomach, my breathing becoming uneven. “No,” I whisper. “No, he couldn’t have done this.”
Ashley bites her bottom lip as she sits down next to me. “You need to call him, Carly,” she tells me gently. “Talk to him, right now.”
I nod, taking a deep breath as I take out my phone. Ashley motions to me that she’s gonna wait outside and I nod, dialing Harry’s number with shaking hands. I wait for him to pick up, and after four rings, he does. “Hello?” his tired, husky voice asks. I forgot that it was like, two in the morning over there right now.
“Are you honestly that much of a coward to event tell me that you’re snogging Kate behind my back?” I waste no time in spitting out.
“C-Carly?” Harry’s tense voice asks, seeming wide awake right now. “Look, Carls, it’s not what it looks like.”
“It’s exactly what it looks like,” I snap. “You’re cheating on me with Kate, Harry!” I exclaim, the tears now pouring out of my eyes. “How could you?”
“Carly, babe,” he says. “She just came down for a visit, I had no idea she was coming here. We just went out a few times and one thing led to another, and we kissed.”
I let out a breath of disbelief. “How can you be so casual and calm about this?” I ask, my hand clenchng my iPhone tightly. “And of all people, you had to cheat on me with Kate?”
“She really isn’t that bad, Carly,” Harry insists.
My watery eyes widen. “Are you seriously defending her right now?” I ask in disbelief. I calm myself down, trying to get my voice even. “Please tell me all you did with her was kiss.” I was answered with by silence. My heart fell from my chest to my stomach, a lump forming in my throat. “H-Harry?”
“I... I can’t,” he finally whispers.
Fresh tears stream down my face as he says that. “You... You slept with her?”
“Carly, I’m so so sorry,” Harry says urgently. “I never meant for any of this to happen, I swear.”
“I know you didn’t,” I say. “But you let it happen anyway. I can’t believe you, Harry.”
“Just give me another chance... Please,” he says, his voice cracking at the end.
A tear falls out of my eye as I shake my head, even though I know Harry can’t see me. “I’m sorry, Harry,” I say quietly. “But it’s done. We’re done.”
“Carly,” Harry says, his voice wavering. “Don’t do this, please.”
He was crying.
“I’m sorry, but I have to,” I tell him, wanting this conversation to be over with already.
“You don’t have to, you want to,” he insists.
A small, quiet sob escapes my lips. “No, Harry, I have to,” I correct him. “I can’t do this. Maybe this whole thing was wrong. Maybe this long distance relationship isn’t going to work out for us after all. We were stupid to even try this.”
“So what?” Harry asks, his voice growing suddenly angry. “You’re just gonna throw it all away? As if it meant nothing to you? Just because I made a stupid mistake?”
“You slept with someone, Goddamit!” I was now yelling. “You can’t honestly expect me to be fine with it, and forgive you so fucking easily! Maybe this year’s worth of relationship didn’t mean anything to you, but it sure as hell meant a lot to me. And maybe you’re not quite cut for a steady relationship. It was all probably a game for you, wasn’t it?” I seethe.
I know the last part had gotten Harry angry, but I honestly couldn’t care any less by now. I was heart broken and angry. “Don’t you dare ever say that I didn’t care,” he snarls from the other end of the line. “You know damn well that I love you, Carly. This whole relationship means a lot to me, and you know it. What do you possibly know? Maybe it means to me more than it even means to you. I made a mistake, Carly. And I won’t let it happen again.”
“Damn right it won’t happen again,” I snap. “Because there won’t be an ‘again.’ We’re done, Harry. For good. I’m not gonna take you back so easily. You can’t keep your hands to yourself, you know? I saw all of those pictures of you touching and dancing with all of those girls. I never said anything because I thought you were probably just having a good time. But kissing and sleeping with Kate? There’s a line, Harry, and you fucking crossed it by a mile.”
“You’re just gonna throw a year’s worth of relationship away? Just like that?!” he exclaims.
Tears angrily drop from my eyes. “Yeah, I am,” I say. “Why do you even care? You never loved me. You’re probably busy fucking Kate.”
“That was only one time!” he shouts angrily, making me pull the phone away from my ear slightly.
“Just because it was one time, doesn’t make it okay, Harry!” I scream. “I’m just done with you, okay? This whole thing was a mistake. A giant mistake.”
“So that’s it?” Harry asks, calming down a bit. “You’re just gonna break up with me?”
The stupid tears started building up inside my eyes again. “Yeah, I am,” I say in a shaky breath.
“Fine. If that’s what you want,” Harry says, his voice seeming emotionless.
I swallow the lump in my throat. “Goodbye, Harry.”
“Wait,” he says suddenly. I stay quiet, waiting for him to continue. “Don’t you dare ever say that I never loved you. Because you know damn well that I did.”
And with that, he hangs up.
-END OF FLASHBACK-
This whole thing took place a few days ago. As soon as he had hung up, I had burst out crying, falling on to the floor as Ashley came rushing in. Obviously, the rest of the girls had found out about the break up, and had called to see if I was okay. Even the boys had called, with Zayn and Liam being angry at Harry for sleeping with Kate.
Speaking of Kate, she got what she wanted. She wanted Harry, and she most definitely got him. Soha had told me that Niall had told her that her and Harry were together. Apparently, as soon as Kate had heard about mine and Harry’s break up, she rushed over in ‘concern’, and Harry had asked for her to be his girlfriend.
That bloody idiot moved on faster than I can blink.
But it hurts. It hurts how fast he had moved on. Whether he is with Kate because he fancies her or because he’s just using her as a rebound, it still hurts. Neither of the boys nor I have had any interviews, so the public doesn’t know about us. Harry hasn’t been out much, so no pictures of him and Kate walking around have come out. The fans and media are all left confused, because no comment of those pictures of Harry with the girls and ‘mystery blonde’ have come out from me or the boys.
When Kristen found out, she decided I take a few days off. She knew how much I love Harry, and thinks it’s good if I just sit back and relax. But tomorrow is the last day of my days off, and Kristen had set up an interview for me. She told me that I need to clear all of this up, not wanting to leave the media and fans in the dark and have them come up with their own theories. She was right, but I didn’t want to go out. Literally for the past few days, I have been locked up in my room with Coco as I watch sad romantic movies.
I felt pathetic.
But I have to get up, I have to be productive. I have to let my fans know that I’m perfectly fine, even though I’m not. But all I wanted to do was just wake up. I keep telling myself the whole break up scenario was just a horrid nightmare, that I’ll soon wake up and Harry and I would still be happily together. Sadly, we all know that’s not happening.
My lonely thoughts were suddenly interrupted by Ashley as she sat down on the couch next to me, handing me a cup of iced tea. I take it from her as she sits down. “How are you feeling?” she asks gently.
“Like crap,” I answer, taking a sip of the tea. Ashley sighs, shaking her head.
“I know it sucks, Carls,” she says, “but it’ll get better. I promise.”
I shake my head. “No, it won’t. Ash, I loved him.”
“Loved?” Ashley asks, raising an eyebrow. “As in, you don’t anymore?”
I pause. Do I still love him? I miss him, there’s no doubt about it. But I don’t know if I still love him. Granted, it’s only been a few days, but look how fast he moved on. Practically the day of the break up, he had called up Kate and probably just kissed her then and there. I wince a bit, imagining Harry kissing Kate.
Love isn’t something that comes so easily, nor is it something that can just fade in a matter of days. Harry and I had been in a relationship for a year, and I loved him with every fiber in my body. He was the reason of my smile, my laughter, my being. Being around him just completed me. But now all of that’s gone. I don’t feel anything anymore. All there is in my body is complete numbness. It’s like I can’t feel anything anymore, like I’m not capable of feeling any type of emotion.
I look at Ashley, who’s patiently waiting for an answer. “Honestly, Ash... I don’t know.”
“So Carly, are you single or what’s happening? Multiple rumors were flying around about you and Harry Styles,” the interviewer, Sandra, asks.
I froze, biting the inside of my cheek. You can do this, Carly, I told myself. Just tell them that it didn’t work out, that you’re done with him. “Yeah, erm, I’m single,” I say, plastering a small, fake smile on my face.
Several gasps are heard from the audience as I send them a small smile, and Sandra’s eyes grow wide. “When did this happen? The two of you looked so in love.”
I shrug, feeling a bit uncomfortable. “The whole long distance thing just wasn’t working out for us,” I say as if it was no big deal, when it was quite the opposite. “We figured that it would be better if we broke it off and saw other people. It was best for both of us.”
Sandra nods understandingly. “Well, don’t worry, Carly,” she smiles. “You’ll find your prince charming some day.”
I thought I already did.
“It’ll happen someday,” I force a smile.
The interview ends shortly after, and I rush back stage. “You’re fine. You’re okay,” Ashley, who’s waiting for me back stage, says as she wraps her arms around me.
“That’s the thing,” I say, sniffling. “I’m not gonna be okay.”
Ashley gives me one last squeeze before Kristen and Randy pull us out and into the van. As we drive away from the building, I go on Twitter, just to see it being blown up by not only my fans, but also One Direction’s.
-WHAT WHAT WHAT HARRY AND CARLY BROKE UP??!!!
-You’ve got to be kidding me. Someone tell me this is some sort of sick joke. Omfg no.
-Guys I’m crying why did Harly break up!!??
-Good finally. Carly deserves someone better.
-Nooooooooo!!!! Harly was my favorite ship ever!
-The Harly ship has finally sunk! Thank god Harry dumped that slag.
-Carly’s smile during that interview was totally fake. I can tell. She’s hurting.
-Harly needs to get back together. Harry and Carly were so perfect.
-Harry and Carly oh my God no please get back together.
-Harly shit shit shit shit nooo.
In a matter of minutes, ‘Harry and Carly’ was one of the world wide trends, and I had to exit out of Twitter to keep myself from looking at all of the tweets.
I guess all good things must come to an end.